تَمَاسُكُ الأُسَرِ سَبِيلُ استِقْرَارِهَا : Family cohesion is the key to stability

Al Quran is the final Holy Book revealed upon the Last of Prophets Hazrat Muhammad (PBUH). The Quran & Sunnah is the only source of holy guidance as it entails detailed instructions for each and every walk of human life. Here guidance from Quran for the followers of Islam (تَمَاسُكُ الأُسَرِ سَبِيلُ استِقْرَارِهَا : Family cohesion is the key to stability) is discussed wrt importance of family cohesion for stability in life for better living from Quran and Hadith of Prophet ﷺ. This is an approved Jumma Khutba from the Sultanate of Oman and translated in English.

بِسۡمِ ٱللهِ ٱلرَّحۡمَـٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيمِ

In the name of ALLAH, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

تَمَاسُكُ الأُسَرِ سَبِيلُ استِقْرَارِهَا

Family cohesion is the key to stability

Praise be to Allah, who created for us mates from among ourselves, and chose for us Islam as a law and a method. I bear witness that there is no god but Allah alone, without partner, and I bear witness that Muhammad, peace be upon him, is His servant and Messenger. He has been the best husband for the best family; in him there is a model for every husband and an example for every family. May the prayers and peace of ALLAH be upon him, his family, his companions, and those who follow them in righteousness until the Day of Judgment. This is the translation of the recited verse from Surah Al Room:

أَمَّا بَعْدُ، فاعوذ باللہ من الشیطان الرجیم- بسم اللہ الرحمن الرحیم 

وَمِنۡ ءَايَـٰتِهِۦۤ أَنۡ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنۡ أَنفُسِكُمۡ أَزۡوَٲجً۬ا لِّتَسۡكُنُوٓاْ إِلَيۡهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيۡنَڪُم مَّوَدَّةً۬ وَرَحۡمَةً‌ۚ إِنَّ فِى ذَٲلِكَ لَأَيَـٰتٍ۬ لِّقَوۡمٍ۬ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ

And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for people who reflect. 

Surah Al Room – 21

O servants of ALLAH: Fear ALLAH and Adopt piety and obey ALLAH, so fear ALLAH, O servants of God, regarding yourselves and your families, and protect your family with a protection that will save you on the Day of Judgment, for it is the mother cell of this great nation.

O honorable Muslims: The family has a high status and a great position in Islam. ALLAH has made its beginning one of His signs, which is marriage. ALLAH Almighty says in Surah Al Room:

وَمِنۡ ءَايَـٰتِهِۦۤ أَنۡ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنۡ أَنفُسِكُمۡ أَزۡوَٲجً۬ا لِّتَسۡكُنُوٓاْ إِلَيۡهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيۡنَڪُم مَّوَدَّةً۬ وَرَحۡمَةً‌ۚ

And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy.

Surah Al Room – 21-Part

So what do you think of the signs of Allah? And He made its binding a bond which He called a firm covenant. So He, glory be to Him, says in Surah An Nisa:

وَأَخَذۡنَ مِنڪُم مِّيثَـٰقًا غَلِيظً۬ا

and they have taken from you a firm and strong covenant?

Surah An Nisa – 21-Part

A sign of ALLAH and a firm covenant based on Allah's command, this is the family, O Muslims. What cohesion can equal it? What solidarity in this world can compare to it? Indeed, it is a solid building and a firm foundation, constructed by ALLAH, the Almighty, the Wise. What a wonderful and honorable building it is, and what a great fortress it is, and even greater! This is so, and it is incumbent upon Muslims, whether they are husbands or wives, to take care of this building with due care. And that they protect it from all that may harm it, as is rightfully theirs. The way to do this has been made clear by ALLAH in His Book, and clarified by His Messenger in his Sunnah, so that this fortress may be in permanent safety, tranquility, stability, and prosperity. One of the means of protecting the family and preserving its cohesion and stability is to deal with others in a good manner. ALLAH Almighty says in Surah An Nisa:

وَعَاشِرُوهُنَّ بِٱلۡمَعۡرُوفِ‌ۚ

And live with them honourably.

Surah An Nisa – 19-Part

The Prophet, peace be upon him, reminded spouses to look at each other with kindness if they saw something they disliked in each other. He said, “A believing man should not hate a believing woman. If he dislikes one characteristic in her, he will be pleased with another.”

Among the means of achieving family stability and cohesion, O servants of ALLAH, is raising children in a way that pleases ALLAH, warning them against what angers Him—ALLAH forbid—monitoring them in this regard, and training them with gentleness, kindness, and firmness until they adhere to ALLAH’s command, in fulfillment of His command, He says in Surah At Tahrim:

يَـٰٓأَيُّہَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ قُوٓاْ أَنفُسَكُمۡ وَأَهۡلِيكُمۡ نَارً۬ا

O you who believe! Ward off from yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell)

Surah At Tahrim – 6-Part

Among the means of achieving family stability is enjoining what is right and forbidding what is wrong among members of a single family. They are all on a single ship sailing with them on the journey of life, and salvation from the dangers of this life and the afterlife can only be achieved through fear of ALLAH. ALLAH Almighty says in Surah Ta Ha:

وَأۡمُرۡ أَهۡلَكَ بِٱلصَّلَوٰةِ وَٱصۡطَبِرۡ عَلَيۡہَا‌ۖ لَا نَسۡـَٔلُكَ رِزۡقً۬ا‌ۖ نَّحۡنُ نَرۡزُقُكَ‌ۗ وَٱلۡعَـٰقِبَةُ لِلتَّقۡوَىٰ

And enjoin As-Salât (the prayer) on your family, and be patient in offering them [i.e. the Salât (prayers)]. We ask not of you a provision (i.e. to give Us something: money); We provide for you. And the good end (i.e. Paradise) is for the Muttaqûn (pious and righteous persons.

Surah Ta-Ha – 132

Likewise, among the things that make a family stable is each family member's knowledge of their role and what is required of them, so that they fulfill it to the fullest extent. The elders care for the younger, the youngers respect the older, and the head of the family strives to serve its interests, anticipating a great reward for doing so.

O educators: Have you seen a wise man who builds a beautiful house with all the means of comfort and luxury, then comes after that and every day demolishes it stone by stone until he destroys it and ruins it? This is what happens to those who bring about disintegration in their families. Beware, beware of the causes of family disintegration. O believing men and women, learn them so that you may be on your guard against them. How many people undermine the foundations of their homes and destroy their structures without realizing it! Among the most important and dangerous causes of family disintegration are frequent disputes, quarrels, and anger, as these have a detrimental effect on people’s souls. Therefore, one of the most comprehensive and excellent pieces of advice given by the Messenger of ALLAH was when a man came to him and said, “O Messenger of ALLAH, give me advice.” He said, “Do not get angry.” The Prophet repeated, “Do not get angry,” several times. This is only because anger and quarreling are dangerous to a person’s heart, soul, and mind. So, a Muslim should restrain himself from anger in order to protect his family from disintegration.

Among the reasons for the disintegration of the family are: lack of interest or lack thereof, and each member being preoccupied with himself and withdrawing into himself. So you see in them the image of the family, not its reality, and the image of unity, not its content. And that is not why the family was created. Rather, the family is harmony and cooperation, and sharing in joy and sorrow. How wonderful it is when they gather around the table, chat, and keep each other company. One tells a story, and the other narrates a joke. This presents a problem, and with this, hearts are united, souls embrace, and life becomes a garden of joy. Among the causes of family disintegration are: selfishness and prioritizing the attainment of rights over the performance of duties. If every individual waited to obtain his rights before fulfilling his duties, no one would have any rights. Rather, initiative and selflessness create cohesion and sustain love and stability.

So fear ALLAH, O servants of ALLAH, and adhere to the means of family stability, and avoid the causes of its disintegration, and you will succeed and be happy.

أقولُ مَا تَسْمَعُونَ، وَأَسْتَغْفِرُ اللهَ العَظِيمَ لِي وَلَكُمْ، فَاسْتَغْفِرُوهُ يَغْفِرْ لَكُمْ، إِنَّهُ هُوَ الغَفُورُالرَّحِيمُ، وَادْعُوهُ يَسْتَجِبْ لَكُمْ، إِنَّهُ هُوَ البَرُّ الكَرِيمُ

I say what you hear, and I ask forgiveness from God Almighty for me and for you, so ask forgiveness from Him and He will forgive you, for He is the Forgiving and Merciful, and pray to Him and He will answer you, for He is The noble righteousness



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   الحَمْدُ للَّهِ الَّذِي جَعَلَ الزَّوَاجَ سَكَنًا، وَجَعَلَ الأُسْرَةَ وَطَنًا، وَأَشْهَدُ أَنْ لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللَّهُ وَحْدَهُ لَا شَرِيكَ لَهُ، وَأَشْهَدُ أَنَّ مُحَمَّدًا عَبْدُهُ وَرَسُولُهُ، صَلَوَاتُ اللَّهِ وَسَلامُهُ عَلَيْهِ وَعَلَى آلِهِ وَصَحْبِهِ أَجْمَعِينَ، وَالتَّابِعِينَ لَهُمْ بِإِحْسَانٍ إِلَى يَوْمِ الدِّينِ

Praise be to ALLAH, who has made mercy beloved to us, by His grace and compassion, and I bear witness that there is no god but ALLAH, He is alone with no partner, and I bear witness that our Master and our Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, the servant of God and His Messenger, is the best of people to the people, and the furthest away from what is incumbent upon them beyond their capacity. May ALLAH’s prayers and peace be upon him, upon his family and good companions, and whoever follows their path until the Day of Judgment.

Now then, O nation of Islam: The stability of the Muslim family has a great impact on the stability of society and the safety of the nation. The family is nothing but a small unit from which and without it a larger society is formed. The well-being and stability of the family reaps its fruits near and far, and the individual and society enjoy its shade. With the stability of the family and the righteousness of the offspring, the delight of the eye is achieved, which ALLAH mentioned in His Noble Book, when He said about His righteous servants:

وَٱلَّذِينَ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنَا هَبۡ لَنَا مِنۡ أَزۡوَٲجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّـٰتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعۡيُنٍ۬ وَٱجۡعَلۡنَا لِلۡمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا

And those who say: "Our Lord! Bestow on us from our wives and our offspring the comfort of our eyes, and make us leaders for the Muttaqûn" 

Surah Al Furqan – 74

With the stability of the family and its safety from disintegration, a righteous generation will emerge that will be beneficial to itself, its parents, and its nation. The eyes of its parents will be content with it during their lifetime, and the reward for its words and actions will reach them after their death. The Messenger of ALLAH said: “When the son of Adam dies, his deeds come to an end except for three: ongoing charity, beneficial knowledge, or a righteous child who prays for him.” With the stability and cohesion of the family, society is cohesive, and intellectual, behavioral, and moral deviations are reduced. Thus, the youth of society, both men and women, flourish, and the nation prospers and takes pride in its righteous youth, who can become promising pioneers and leaders, as we love and hope.

So fear Allah, O Muslims, and know that the righteous, cohesive family is the first fortress of society and nation. Preserve its stability by adhering to what Allah and His Messenger have commanded, and you will be happy in this world and the hereafter.

هَذَا وَصَلُّوا وَسَلِّمُوا عَلَى إمَامِ الْمُرْسَلِينَ؛ مُحَمَّدٍ الهَادِي الأَمِينِ، فَقَدْ أَمَرَكُمْ رَبكُمْ بذَلكَ حينَ قَالَ

إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ وَمَلَـٰٓٮِٕڪَتَهُ ۥ يُصَلُّونَ عَلَى ٱلنَّبِىِّۚ يَـٰٓأَيُّہَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ صَلُّواْ عَلَيۡهِ وَسَلِّمُواْ تَسۡلِيمًا

Surah Al Ahzaab – 56

So pray and send peace upon the leader of the messengers, Muhammad, the guide and trustworthy. Your Lord has commanded you to do so when He said: “Indeed, Allah and His angels send blessings upon the Prophet. O you who have believed, send blessings upon him and salute him with a worthy salutation.” 

He says in Surah Al Ahzab: ALLAH and His kingdom send blessings upon the Prophet. O you who have believed, pray upon him and grant him peace.

Surah Al Ahzaab – 56

اللَّهُمَّ صَلِّ وسَلِّم عَلَى نَبِيِّنَا مُحَمَّدٍ وَعَلَى آلِ نَبِيِّنَا مُحَمَّدٍ، كَمَا صَلَّيْتَ وسَلَّمتَ عَلَى نَبِيِّنَا إِبْرَاهِيمَ وَعَلَى آلِ نَبِيِّنَا إِبْرَاهِيمَ، وَبَارِكْ عَلَى نَبِيِّنَا مُحَمَّدٍ وَعَلَى آلِ نَبِيِّنَا مُحَمَّدٍ كَمَا بَارَكْتَ عَلَى نَبِيِّنَا إِبْرَاهِيمَ وَعَلَى آلِ نَبِيِّنَا إِبْرَاهِيمَ فِي الْعَالَمِينَ، إِنَّكَ حَمِيدٌ مَجِيدٌ، وَارْضَ اللَّهُمَّ عَنْ خُلَفَائِهِ الرَّاشِدِينَ، وَعَنْ أَزْوَاجِهِ أُمَّهَاتِ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ وَعَنْ سَائِرِ الصَّحَابَةِ أَجْمَعِينَ، وَعَنِ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ وَالْمُؤْمِنَاتِ، وعَنْ جَمْعِنَا هَذَا بِرَحْمَتِكَ يَا أَرْحَمَ الرَّاحِمِينَ

O ALLAH, bless and grant peace upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon the family of our Prophet Muhammad, as You prayed and peace upon our Prophet Abraham and upon the family of our Prophet Abraham, and bless our Prophet Muhammad and the family of our Prophet Muhammad, just as You blessed our Prophet Abraham and the family of our Prophet Abraham in the worlds. Indeed, You are Praiseworthy and Glorious. And be pleased, O Allah, with his Rightly-Guided Caliphs, and with his wives, the Mothers of the Believers, and with all the rest of the Companions, and with the believing men and women, and with this gathering of ours, by Your mercy, O Most Merciful of the merciful.

اللَّهُمَّ اجْعَلْ جَمْعَنَا هَذَا جَمْعًا مَرْحُوْمًا، وَاجْعَلْ تَفَرُّقَنَا مِنْ بَعْدِهِ تَفَرُّقًا مَعْصُوْمًا وَلا تَدَعْ فِينَا وَلا مَعَنَا شَقِيًّا وَلا مَحْرُومًا

Oh ALLAH, make this gathering of us a merciful gathering, and make our separation after it an infallible separation, and do not leave among us or with us any wretched or deprived.

اللَّهُمَّ أَعِزَّ الإِسْلامَ وَاهْدِ الْمُسْلِمِينَ إِلَى الْحَقِّ، وَاجْمعْ كَلِمَتَهُمْ عَلَى الخَيْرِ، وَاكْسِرْ شَوْكَةَ الظَّالِمِينَ، وَاكْتُبِ السَّلامَ وَالأَمْنَ لِعِبادِكَ أَجْمَعِينَ

Oh ALLAH, honor Islam, guide Muslims to the truth, unite their words in goodness, break the power of the oppressors, and grant peace and security to your servants. All of them. 

اللَّهُمَّ كُنْ عَوْنًا لإِخْوَانِنَا فِي أَرْضِ الأَقْصَى المُبَارَكِ، وَكُنْ مَعَهُمْ وَثَبِّـتْهُمْ وَارْبِطْ عَلَى قُلُوبِهِمْ وَصَبِّرْهُمْ، وَاخْذُلْ عَدُوَّكَ وَعَدُوَّهُمْ، وَاجْعَلِ الدَّائِرَةَ عَلَيْهِ يَا ذَا الجَلالِ وَالإِكْرَامِ

O Allah, be a helper to our brothers in the blessed land of Al-Aqsa, be with them, strengthen them, strengthen their hearts, and grant them patience. Disappoint Your enemy and their enemy, and turn the tables on him, O Possessor of Majesty and Honor.

اللَّهُمَّ إِنَّا نَسْأَلُكَ الثَّباتَ فِي الأَمْرِ، وَالعَزِيمَةَ عَلَى الرُّشْدِ، ونَسْأَلُكَ شُكْرَ نِعْمَتِكَ، وَحُسْنَ عِبَادَتِكَ، ونَسْأَلُكَ قُلُوبًا سَلِيمةً وأَلْسِنةً صَادِقةً، ونَسْأَلُكَ مِنْ خَيْرِ مَا تَعْلَمُ، وَنعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ شَرِّ مَا تَعْلَمُ وَنَسْتَغْفِرُكَ لِمَا تَعْلَمُ

O Allah, we ask You for steadfastness in our affairs and determination to do what is right. We ask You for gratitude for Your blessings and proper worship of You. We ask You for sound hearts and truthful tongues. We ask You for the best of what You know and seek refuge in You from the worst of what You know. We seek Your forgiveness for what You know.

اللَّهُمَّ يَا حَيُّ يَا قَيُّومُ يَا ذَا الجَلالِ وَالإِكْرَامِ، لاَ إِلَهَ إِلاَّ أَنْتَ سُبْحَانَكَ بِكَ نَستَجِيرُ وَبِرَحْمَتِكَ نَستَغِيثُ أَلاَّ تَكِلَنَا إِلَى أَنفُسِنَا طَرفَةَ عَينٍ، وَلاَ أَدنَى مِنْ ذَلِكَ وَأَصلِحْ لَنَا شَأْنَنَا كُلَّهُ يَا مُصلِحَ شَأْنِ الصَّالِحِينَ

Oh ALLAH, O Ever-Living, O Ever-Living, O Possessor of Majesty and Honour, there is no god but You, Glory be to You, by You we seek refuge and by Your mercy we seek help, that you will not leave us to Our souls are within the blink of an eye, and nothing is closer than that. And rectify for us all our affairs, O Reconciliator, the affairs of the righteous.

اللَّهُمَّ رَبَّنَا احْفَظْ أَوْطَانَنَا وَأَعِزَّ سُلْطَانَنَا وَأَيِّدْهُ بِالْحَقِّ وَأَيِّدْ بِهِ الْحَقَّ يَا رَبَّ العَالَمِينَ، اللَّهُمَّ أَسْبِغْ عَلَيْهِ نِعمَتَكَ، وَأَيِّدْهُ بِنُورِ حِكْمَتِكَ، وَسَدِّدْهُ بِتَوفِيقِكَ، وَاحفَظْهُ بِعَينِ رعَايَتِكَ

Oh ALLAH, our Lord, protect our countries, honor our authority, support it with the truth, and support it with the truth, O Lord of the worlds. Oh God, bestow your blessing upon him, Support it with the light of your wisdom, guide it with your blessings, and protect it with your care.

اللَّهُمَّ أَنْزِلْ عَلَيْنَا مِنْ بَرَكَاتِ السَّمَاء وَأَخْرِجْ لَنَا مِنْ خَيْرَاتِ الأَرْضِ، وَبَارِكْ لَنَا في ثِمَارِنَا وَزُرُوعِنَا وكُلِّ أَرزَاقِنَا يَا ذَا الْجَلالِ وَالإِكْرَامِ

O ALLAH, send down upon us from the blessings of the sky and bring forth for us from the goodness of the earth, and bless for us our fruits and our crops and all our provisions, O Possessor of Majesty and Generosity.

رَبَّنَا آتِنَا في الدُّنْيَا حَسَنَةً وَفي الآخِرَةِ حَسَنَةً وَقِنَا عَذَابَ النَّارِ

Our Lord, give us good in this world and good in the Hereafter and protect us from the punishment of the Fire.

اللَّهُمَّ اغْفِرْ لِلْمُؤْمِنِينَ وَالمُؤْمِنَات، المُسْلِمِينَ وَالمُسْلِمَات، الأَحْيَاءِ مِنْهُمْ وَالأَمْوَاتِ، إِنَّكَ سَمِيعٌ قَرِيبٌ مُجِيبُ الدُّعَاءِ

O ALLAH, forgive the believing men and women, the Muslim men and women, the living and the dead among them. Indeed, You are the All-Hearing, the Near, the Answerer of supplications.

عِبَادَ الله- اللہ کے بندو

 إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يَأۡمُرُ بِٱلۡعَدۡلِ وَٱلۡإِحۡسَـٰنِ وَإِيتَآىِٕ ذِى ٱلۡقُرۡبَىٰ وَيَنۡهَىٰ عَنِ ٱلۡفَحۡشَآءِ وَٱلۡمُنڪَرِ وَٱلۡبَغۡىِ‌ۚ يَعِظُكُمۡ لَعَلَّڪُمۡ تَذَكَّرُونَ

O servants of ALLAH - Indeed, ALLAH commands justice and good deeds, and bestows favor on relatives, and forbids indecency. And the denier and the transgressor admonish you that you may remember.

Surah An Nahl-90

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وآخر دعوانا ان الحمد للہ رب العالمین- سبحان ربک رب العزة عما يصفون، وسلام على المرسلين، والحمد لله رب العالمين